Christians, relying on the Bible, believe that there should be limits to sexuality. But why?
No one likes to have their gods stolen or threatened.
Often, people around us can attribute this to the fact that we are old-fashioned, critical, and contrarian. Contemporary culture, on the other hand, is considered pro-sex. After all, he does not dwell on questions of gender, while increasingly questioning the idea of monogamy. It is therefore not surprising that the limits that Christians insist on when it comes to sexuality are not very well accepted. When freedom in our choices related to sex and sexuality becomes so cherished to the point of idolatry, we should expect negative responses. No one likes to have their gods stolen or threatened.
Why do Christians limit sex? The tragic thing is that many Christians themselves fail to give a good answer. It is often just one of a long list of rules that their church or elders have passed down to them. And the why, the big picture, is often not provided. What this also means, as we know, is that rule-based people tend to be judgmental and simply look down on others for any rule-breaking. And it doesn’t change the general idea of what Christians believe or don’t believe about sex – and why there are limits.
The why is important
So why do Christians limit the number of people allowed to have sex? Here are two main reasons why we consider God and how he has made sex a good gift.
1. Sex is sacred
First, and positively, we believe that sex is so sacred or special that it should only be set aside for a certain relationship and context.
Christians are mocked because society has a very low view of sex.
And Christians can be mocked for it – it’s seen as antiquated at best, but really out of step with society’s beliefs. Instead, we have such an opinion of the goodness of sex that we don’t think it should be directed at anything or anyone. And the reason why Christians are mocked for this is because, on the other hand, society’s view of sex is very low.
2. Out of place, sex is damaging
Second, somewhat negatively, when sex is removed from the the context it was created to make Christians think that sex is so potentially damaging that there should be limits.
Many of us know how sex has been misused to bring about brokenness.
And I would tell you that far too many of us know all too well how sex can or has been misused to cause or lead to pain or brokenness. Christians therefore recognize that humanity has the bad habit of transforming and denigrating the good gifts of God.
That said, the truth is that everyone sets limits on sex. You might not think so, but it is. We all do it.
Everyone sets limits on sex
We all think there should be limits to sex.
Here’s a major pushback for people who have a problem with Christians who say sex should be limited. This is the case: everyone thinks there should be limits on who is allowed to have sex. Let me give you four examples.
1. Animals
Contemporary society generally recognizes that people should not have sex with animals. Instead, we seek to limit sex to only people who are allowed to have it with other people. We set limits.
2. Age
Contemporary society generally recognizes that young children should not have sex with each other, right? Even if there is mutual consent, we do not believe that sex is a matter of pleasure for children. Contemporary society also recognizes that adults should not have sexual relations with young children. A recognition that is tragically still often broken.
My point, however, is this: for various reasons, when it comes to age, we place limits on sex.
3. Family
Contemporary society generally recognizes that sexual relations should not take place between close relatives: parents and their children; siblings; Uncles and aunts; even adopted versions of these. And what is all this? Boundaries.
4. Consent
Christians are not strange or strange when they also say that there should be limits to sex.
Again, contemporary society generally recognizes that consent between two adults must be present for sexual relations to be legal. Apart from consent, it is rape and not sex. Unfortunately, we all know how often consent is not present. But, again, either because we recognize the benefits of sex, or perhaps more because we recognize the potential dangers of misused sexuality, we impose limits on sex.
So, the point: we all recognize that sex is something that should be limited. In this sense, Christians are neither strange nor strange when they also assert that there should be limits to sexuality.
Two Christian Limits: Context and Gender
As Christians we agree with the limits that modern society seeks to impose, bestiality, rape, incestAnd consent. But we also promote two others: the first is context; and the second concerns gender. That is, when it comes to God’s purposes for us, the Christian view is that sex concerns the context of marriage between a man and a woman.
It’s Christians who are truly pro-sex.
And once again, the why matters. These boundaries are there to make sex good as God gave it to us. Christians are not, or should not be, seen as simply anti-pleasure or overly religious. Instead, Christians want sex to be good for those who experience it — and by “good,” I don’t mean the distorted fantasies of porn stars. No, I mean good, that is to say for the good, the health, the well-being of the people involved.
Christians who want what God wants impose limits. But these are limits to promote development and health; like lines on a road so cars don’t crash and kill people, but instead can drive and move around. Seen this way, it’s actually Christians who are truly pro-sex.
Finally, it is true that our world, and even Christians, can sometimes have such sinful selfishness that even sex within these limits can still be misused. But it encourages us to remember our constant need to seek God’s help and direction in what real life looks like.
